FizzBuzz was fun, and I got great feedback and learned a few things (which I hope I put in practice here), but only scratched the surface. I wanted to explore the LOLCODE language a bit more, so I implemented a little rock-paper-scissors, to play with functions, parameters, return values.. and user input.

Unfortunately I haven't figured out how to get compileonline to take more than a single value through STDIN, so I dropped the idea of making a GAEMLOOPZ and only made it a single round.

Also AFAICT there's no way of generating random numbers in LOLCODE (specs), so the LOLCAT always wins - it even has a seekrit move for invalid inputs!

HAI 1.2
  
  I HAS A CHEEZ ITZ "CHEEZ"       BTW "ROCK"
  I HAS A BURGR ITZ "BURGR"       BTW "PAPER"
  I HAS A WAFLZ ITZ "WAFLZ"       BTW "SCISSORS"
  I HAS A SEEKRITMOOV ITZ "ZPOCK" BTW SHH, SEEKRIT
  
  
  HOW IZ I GETAMOOV
    
    VISIBLE "WHAT U PLAY?"
    VISIBLE "[C]HEEZ [B]URGR [W]AFLZ"
    
    I HAS A MOOV
    GIMMEH MOOV
    
    MOOV R I IZ VALID8MOOV YR MOOV MKAY
    FOUND YR MOOV
    
  IF U SAY SO
  
  HOW IZ I VALID8MOOV YR MOOV
    
    MOOV, WTF?
      OMG "C", OMG "c"
        MOOV R CHEEZ
        GTFO
        
      OMG "B", OMG "b"
        MOOV R BURGR
        GTFO
      
      OMG "W", OMG "w"
        MOOV R WAFLZ
        GTFO
      
      OMGWTF
        ANY OF BOTH SAEM MOOV AN "ZPOCK" AN BOTH SAEM MOOV AN "zpock" MKAY
        O RLY?
          YA RLY, MOOV R SEEKRITMOOV
          NO WAI
            MOOV R SMOOSH "... WUTS " AN MOOV AN " ANYWAI" MKAY
        OIC

    OIC
    
    FOUND YR MOOV
    
  IF U SAY SO
  
  HOW IZ I PIKAMOOV YR MOOV

    I HAS A ULTIMAETMOOV
    
    MOOV, WTF?
      OMG "CHEEZ" BTW must be a constant value :(
        ULTIMAETMOOV R BURGR
        GTFO
        
      OMG "BURGR" BTW must be a constant value :(
        ULTIMAETMOOV R WAFLZ
        GTFO
      
      OMG "WAFLZ" BTW must be a constant value :(
        ULTIMAETMOOV R CHEEZ
        GTFO
      
      OMG "ZPOCK" BTW must be a constant value :(
        ULTIMAETMOOV R "Y U CHEAT? I"
        GTFO
      
      OMGWTF
        ULTIMAETMOOV R SEEKRITMOOV

    OIC
    
    FOUND YR ULTIMAETMOOV
    
  IF U SAY SO
  
  HOW IZ I WINTEHGAEM YR MOOV AN YR ULTIMAETMOOV
    
    VISIBLE SMOOSH "Y U PLAY " AN MOOV MKAY
    VISIBLE SMOOSH "MAH " AN ULTIMAETMOOV AN " WINZ LOL" MKAY
    
  IF U SAY SO
  
  OBTW      
    was going to make a GAEMLOOP,
    but stupidly I can't seem to figure out
    how to pass multiple values to STDIN with this "IDE"...
    so this program will only run a single round.
  TLDR
  
  HOW IZ I PLAYAMOOV
    
    I HAS A MOOV
    MOOV R I IZ GETAMOOV MKAY
    
    I HAS A ULTIMAETMOOV
    ULTIMAETMOOV R I IZ PIKAMOOV YR MOOV MKAY
    
    I IZ WINTEHGAEM YR MOOV AN YR ULTIMAETMOOV MKAY
    
  IF U SAY SO
  
  VISIBLE "CHEEZ-BURGR-WAFLZ:)"
  I IZ PLAYAMOOV MKAY

KTHXBYE

###Outputs

Input: c or C

CHEEZ-BURGR-WAFLZ

WHAT U PLAY?
[C]HEEZ [B]URGR [W]AFLZ
Y U PLAY CHEEZ
MAH BURGR WINZ LOL

Input: b or B

CHEEZ-BURGR-WAFLZ

WHAT U PLAY?
[C]HEEZ [B]URGR [W]AFLZ
Y U PLAY BURGR
MAH WAFLZ WINZ LOL

Input: w or W

CHEEZ-BURGR-WAFLZ

WHAT U PLAY?
[C]HEEZ [B]URGR [W]AFLZ
Y U PLAY WAFLZ
MAH CHEEZ WINZ LOL

Input: zzz ..or pretty much anything else:

CHEEZ-BURGR-WAFLZ

WHAT U PLAY?
[C]HEEZ [B]URGR [W]AFLZ
Y U PLAY ... WUTS zzz ANYWAI
MAH ZPOCK WINZ LOL

Input: zpock or ZPOCK

CHEEZ-BURGR-WAFLZ

WHAT U PLAY?
[C]HEEZ [B]URGR [W]AFLZ
Y U PLAY ZPOCK
MAH Y U CHEAT? I WINZ LOL

I don't like that I'm hard-coding the strings in the WTF (switch) block in VALID8MOOV, but I don't think it's possible to extract just the first letter of a YARN (string)... or is it? Also there doesn't seem to be a way of defining compile-time constants, so I had to put literal strings in PIKAMOOV as well.